Sonogram

Today was amazing. I had my first Prenatal doctor visit, I was a little nervous, not knowing exactly what to expect and all; but the appointment went very well. It looks like I will be having a low risk pregnancy. Hooray!
I experience my very first sonogram, and I have to say, my baby is the cutest baby in the history of babies. Ever. So the midwife finds the baby, and my oh my was my Sweet Baby active. He was wiggling around, waving his little fingers (that have bones btw), and stretching out those impressively long baby legs. It was quite adorable. I am officially 11weeks and 1day pregnant and Half Pint is 11.3cm long. :)
Today was also the first day that I was officially a proud mommy. I showed everyone pictures of my baby - the receptionist, the pharmacist, the photo lab employee, the cashier, and a random lady in the picture frame isle. I also made copies of sonogram pictures today which have been framed and placed at my desk, on the grandma-to-be's desk, by the bed, and in my living room. A little excessive? Possibly. Do I care? Absolutely not.
That little baby in my belly has stolen my heart. No questions asked.

If you did not put the baby in there, don't touch the belly.

So whoever decided that running up to a pregnant belly in public, exclaiming aww very loudly, and rubbing said belly was appropriate is an idiot. That my friends, is the easiest way to lose an arm.

For most of my pregnancy my game plan for these idiots was to look at them and say "I'm not pregnant." The look these people give you is FABULOUS. Then of course, I have to say, "Just kidding, I'm pregnant." Although, these people will think twice before ever running up and groping another woman's pregnant belly. So you are welcome pregnant women of the world!

WTF..

I text Jay today to tell him about my Thurs doctor appointment. I got a text back reading"I would marry you if you were not pregnant, I'm not ready for a child, not a good time. I'm sorry."

So I called this MF up, told him that I would file with my attorney general for child support and that he needed to decide whether he was going to have any visitation with MY child. I was very clear that there would be no one foot in, one foot out bull shit.

I was not expecting this. Two weeks ago the man was begging to marry me!! How do you just change your mind overnight and bail on your kid and his mother. I did not get pregnant by myself and I will not go down alone. If he wants things to go this way, he needs to be ready for a fight. My father used to say that the only thing worse than an ex wife was a baby mama. Well Jay is about to get a BIG taste of that truth.

This day just keeps getting better and better. New lesson learned - wealthy, attractive, single men suck. Never, under any circumstances, let him not wear a condom. Birth control or otherwise, just say no.

Next Doctor Appointment!

Thurs at 2:30! Hooray Babyy.

Ughhh.

This is a vent.

My step dad needed to borrow my car today, no problem. I pick my car up a little after noon. I drive maybe 3 miles back towards my house and notice that my temp gauges are PAST HOT and my car was slightly smoking. I was almost home so I went ahead and turned the heat on (which did not bring down the gauge at all) and pulled into the drive way.
That irresponsible man drove my car all day with it on hot and had the A/C on full blast. I can't look at it yet bc it is too hot, but that jack *ss could have blown my engine! It was perfectly fine last nice and now it is smoking. I am a single pregnant lady, if you borrow my car, take care of it.
Luckily, I know how to work on cars. As soon as it cools down, I can add coolant and take care of my poor baby.

I am a pregnant woman. What if the car would have broke down on the side of the road? Not safe. What if he broke my car forever? I cant walk 20 minutes to Dr. appointments. I can't afford to buy a new car, that was so careless and rude. I will think twice before I lend him my vehicle again.

Sorry - Just had to vent. I was so angry over this today. When I asked him about it he acted like it was no big deal. That is a fast way to get killed my a pregnant lady behind the wheel of a smoking car.

Mr. Flyy

Mr. Flyy is a friend that I met downtown after Jay disappeared before I found out I was pregnant. We became very close, I was crazy about him. Upon finding out, I told him and he was okay with it. I was like Hooray, I found my soul mate. A week later he told me that he had to move to Virgina in 6 weeks.

I was devastated, but we hung out and made the most of our time together. He moved last weekend on the 6th and I am still adjusting. He was my rock and now I only have him through phone calls and text messages. I know I will be okay, but the 'loss' of him crushed my heart.

I was so over Jay - the way he just bailed on me after we were engaged really upset me. I couldn't be with him anymore and Mr. Flyy filled that void. Without him I have to handle those feelings as well as deal with Mr. Flyy moving away. Add pregnancy to that, and you have yourself a tear fest. It is ridiculous. Mr. Flyy and I still talk everyday, but I miss him.

I am continuing to keep jay at arm's length, even though my mother is pushing me to marry him. I can't marry someone that I do not love or trust, regardless of whether Mr. Flyy was in the picture or not. Jay bailed on me, lied to me about his age, tried to talk me into having an abortion, and then tried to persuade me into a courthouse marriage.. Sorry, too much for me. I will keep my options open, but I cannot just decide on that right now. I have babies to think about, and it will be easier to walk away now than to go through a divorce and custody battle with two kids. Oh my my my. The things I get myself into.

Pregnancy: The Beginning

A loooong time ago.. On March 28th, a woman had her LMP. On April 7th, this woman conceived a child with a man named Jay.

Fast forward to May 3 - My period was laaaaate and I was worried. I talked to my sister and she said "Ohhh girl, take a pg test, you will get Aunt Flow the next day. It works every time for me!" Trusting my sister, I drove to the store, bought a test, came home, tinkled. Left the test on the counter, and put the wash in the dryer. I came back to check on my 'Sure to be NEGATIVE pg test' and it was positive.

I was freaking out. I was to young, I was not married, I had a dog, and ohh no my mother. A huuuge list of worries. I went to work and followed my regular routine that day. The next morning I had breakfast with my mother. I had a terrible cold (apparently a pg symptom) and my mother being well prepared offered me some codeine cough syrup. I declined, obviously. My mother asked why, I loudly blurted out, very hysterical, "I'M KNOCKED UP!!!" in the middle of a very busy IHOP. My mother was not pleased.

After discussing being a dumb *ss and my options, or lack of options rather, I was directed to visit her work later, pee in front of her and take a pg test.. as if my current test was forged by stolen urine? Anyways, I buy a test, drink a whole bunch of orange juice and then could not 'go' because my very disturbed mother was sitting across the toilet starring at me, pants at my ankles, hand between my legs, attempting to take a pg test. Very interesting to say the least. The test came up positive after I was finally able to go. My mother somehow was still surprised and admitted that she was expecting it to say 'not pregnant'. This was one of those many moments that I was very grateful that my smarts came from dear ol' dad.

Next was the responsibility to tell "Jay". I called him, sent him a pg test pic, text messaged, emailed.. homeboy was avoiding me. So I tracked down his twin brother two weeks later and gave him my verified pg form. "Jay" called me in 20 minutes, stepping up and asking what i needed done. So the lesson here ladies, is, stalk their family when they flake out (: The brother might claim to have been accosted, but he will get over it.

And that is the end of that, Craaaaazy stuff.